Sunday, July 25, 2010

Grandma's Piano

"Ain't she sweet?
See her coming down the street.
Now I ask you very confidentially,
Ain't she sweet?"

I hold a vivid memory of Grandma sitting at her piano in Corydon, Iowa, 1975, playing and singing her song for me. I can still hear her voice in my mind and I can still see her smiling eyes and face as she did her little song. I was six years old. I never heard the song before or since, but as I write here, the next verse of Ain't She Sweet seems to want to come out. "Oh me, oh my! Ain't that perfection!" Maybe I remember this song best because Grandma Rissler would more often play and sing hymns. As a child, I guess I felt that her Christian/church-going side was less fun than her card-playing/ musical side. I always had a much greater appreciation of her fun side.

Grandma Rissler was the first to teach me to play piano. She had a duet that she taught me the parts to in stages over the years. I always enjoyed it and our little song came to have a rockin' feel to it when we played it together in later years. It's still the song that I'll play every chance I have to sit down at a piano. She first taught me the song on her upright piano. I think my mom said she also learned to play on that upright piano of Grandma's, but that must have been before someone painted it green. I always knew it as the green piano. I remember it so well in Grandma's old house, but she and Grandpa must have moved out of that house when I was about 8 years old. Then the piano went to my Aunt Ginus's house where it remained until now.

Over the 4th of July weekend, my brother and I played parts of Grandma's duet together when we had a quiet moment in my Uncle Jimmy's house in Chicago. Our families had met there for Cousin Emily's wedding celebration. My time at Uncle Jimmy's house was just a stop on the way to the airport for me. Chris and I were on our way home to New England. Freddy was going to stay another night before traveling to Iowa to visit Aunt Ginus's farm the following day. I was a bit envious, I could have used some more family time. Besides, I always loved Ginus's old farmhouse and I'd love to see it again.

I spoke to Freddy on the phone some days later when we were both home. He filled me in on the rest of his midwest trip. He also told me that he learned that Ginus and Uncle Stan had tried to give Grandma's piano away for some years, to no avail. Nobody wanted it. I guess the green paint along with some permanently out of tune keys made it less than desirable to people. They wanted it out of their house now to make room for a pool table and were considering burning the piano! Freddy responded to Uncle Stan that his only feeling about it was that if he was going to burn the piano in a bonfire, he'd like him to do it while Freddy and his family were there for the July 4th Holiday! -So they did it! Uncle Stan built a big bonfire and dumped the piano on top and they all watched it burn to ashes!

I took this news in and it all felt like really big news to me. I must admit, I hadn't thought of that old piano for years, I didn't even really know that Ginus still had it. I found myself thinking sentimentally of that piano often as the next few days passed. It was just a piano, but I felt a sense of mourning for its demise and a real longing came with the memories that were popping up. I smile when I think of all these feelings now, my emotions were probably still cooking from Emily's wedding. I'd had a bit of quality family time and it wasn't enough, and I knew I had wanted more. My time in Chicago had been wonderful and filled with rare and special moments and feelings. It was all over now, and coming down from it left me depressed. I'd also looked forward to seeing my mom in Chicago for months of anticipation and was deeply disappointed by her last minute cancellation. Now this talk about the piano and I guess I probably wanted my Grandma back too. It seems I'd fallen into a bummer of an exercise in sentimentality. What did I need to care about Grandma's old worthless piano anyway?

Then a few days later, my sister-in law posted the pictures of the event. (Thank you, Jordel- I love these pictures.) I was surprised at the emotion I felt as I looked at the photos of the piano in flames. I put my hands over my face as my eyes swelled with tears and I just gave into it and sobbed for a few moments.

Then I let it all go. When it's time, its time. It was beautiful and sad. It was a treat to celebrate these thoughts of my Grandma Rissler whom I will always hold dear in my heart. I have to say, wasn't she sweet? Wasn't she really, really sweet.

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